Tech Support Humor

December 31, 2007

The Investor

Filed under: Hardware — Tags: , , , , — ankitsoldak @ 3:58 pm

“Sir, if your camera cannot be repaired, then the next thing we can do for you is replace it.”

“With what?”

“A camera of your choice, based upon the value you originally paid, in this case, Rs.10,000/-.”

“Well… what if my camera has gone UP in value since then…?!??!”

Buddy… it ain’t an Elvis collector’s plate, allright?

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Fast computer??

Filed under: Hardware — Tags: , , , , — ankitsoldak @ 3:58 pm

had a customer that recently upgraded from dial-up to DSL. Naturally he complains that his computer didn’t go any faster and that his connection is just as slow. Then he tells me, “First off, don’t blame it on my computer.. I have a Dell 4100. Let’s just start there. It’s a fast computer. . . ” for those who don’t want to look at the specs. . the base specs for this “fast” machine is as follows. . 800Mhz, 128MB Ram, 20GB hard drive, WinME. Then the customer tells me he recently upgraded to WinXP. I checked his memory and he only upgraded it to 256. I never wanted to transfer anyone to the dial tone department so bad in my life.


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June 17, 2007

I need a new hard drive in my monitor?

Filed under: Hardware — mickey @ 7:54 pm

I bought a Compaq latop about three years ago and it’s been great. It’s been on a half-dozen youth retreats as well as various trips to south Georgia, Kentucky, Florida and Michigan, and it’s held up very well. About a month ago the screen went dark. You could still faintly see the text on there, but the backlight was shot. I did some research and determined that it was likely the inverter board that died. I pulled the laptop apart and got the inverter board out so I could order a new one. It didn’t have any info on it that would help, so I decided to call Compaq. Here are parts of that conversation:

Me: My screen has gone dark and I suspect it’s the inverter board. How can I order a new one?
Him: You mean the motherboard.
Me: No. I mean the inverter board.
Him: Oh. The inverter board? Let me talk to my technical supervisor. I”ll be right back.

Him: My supervisor says it might not be the inverter board.
Me: Ok, great. What else might it be? (I was excited, though doubtful that it could be something else)
Him: Well, it could be the USB cable for your floppy drive.
Me: What? That makes no sense, not to mention I don’t have a floppy drive.
Him: Or maybe it’s the hard drive in your monitor.

Now I had to stop and think. Did he really say that?

Me: Did you say the “hard drive in my monitor”?
Him: Yes, the hard drive in your monitor might be bad.

At this point, I let him have it. I’m not an expert on inverter boards, but I know when I’m dealing with a complete moron. I asked for the technical supervisor. The conversation pretty much consisted of me asking for an inverter board and her telling me that they don’t exist and/or I can’t order one. Telling her that I was holding it in my hand didn’t help convince her that it was a real part.

So, I got her supervisor. He simply said he’d transfer me to their parts department and I could order it there.

Sometime during the transfer I got disconnected. I found one on eBay instead. It showed up a few days later and solved the problem.

December 1, 2006

Turn it on?

Filed under: Hardware — mickey @ 11:11 pm

Nurses are typically highly educated, smart people. However, many of them are clueless when it comes to using a computer.

The best call I got went something like this:

Nurse: My computer won’t work.
Me: Ok, what’s going on with it?
Nurse: The screen is black.
Me: Alright. Is the green light visible on the computer?
Nurse: I don’t see one.
Me: Press the power button and let’s see if anything comes up.
Nurse: Hey! That fixed it. It’s normally on when I get here for my shift…

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